“At the heart of Satan’s
attack upon you is his attempt to rob you of your true identity and destiny.”

–Neal
Lozano, Unbound

My last blog post was an attempt to regain parts of me
that I feel I have lost.  Satan had done
well in distracting me from receiving God’s full blessing.  It’s a truth I had known, but not really
understood until I read Unbound by Neal Lozano.  “God wants to bless you much more than you
desire to be blessed.  Allow yourself to
receive from Him.”  Really?  Is it really that easy?  It was actually very, very difficult for me
to write my last blog and ask people for help and ask for specific
things/items/donations, etc.  But isn’t
that exactly what God wants of us?  To
ASK specifically?  Bruce Wilkinson says
it this way: “When we ask for God’s blessing, we’re not asking for more of what
we can get for ourselves.  We are crying
out for the wonderful, unlimited goodness that only God has the power to know
about or give us.”

Wow.  I have
received in FULL this “wonderful, unlimited goodness” of God through His
people.  In the course of 25 days, God
has “surrounded me with love and compassion” and “filled my days with good
things” (Ps 103:4-5).  Every day that I
have been home, I have been blessed by someone. 
I feel so overwhelmed and undeserving of such love. 

One day, Marissa, a college bestie, drove a couple hours
just to meet me for lunch.  “I have a
present for you,” she told me while we were out to lunch at Cracker Barrel.  A
present, she had said, when just her presence was enough.  But when she came back inside, she didn’t
have “a present,” she carried a laundry basket full of presents in her arms!  She gave them to me one by one, and as I
unwrapped these presents, I couldn’t stop the tears that I tried to fight.  What moved me most was reading all the names
on the card of who contributed to the gifts. 
Truly amazing.  Marissa had contacted
a whole crew of people who went to UW-L with me, and together they were able to
raise enough money to support part of my housing fund as well as buy major
items on my wish list, including thoughtful gifts like NFL ticket, cooking
items to buy in Swazi, and a new Macbook Air!

A friend who contributed to these gifts wrote a message
telling me it reminded her of the last scene in “It’s a Wonderful Life” where
all sorts of people came to help George Bailey. 
When I watched the movie (which I used to do every year), I cried.  God wants to bless us, we just need to ask.

I asked, and I received. 
I received every major item on my list from my last post, and in addition, my housing
need for 2016 is fully funded!  The most
amazing surprise is that the overwhelming support came from both acquaintances
and friends—from high school, college, and career connections—like donations
from a couple students, Rachel Howe and Katie Shepardson, a surprise package from a high school acquaintance, Brianna
Lynch, who I had no idea followed my blog, a set of Christian fiction books and
financial support from my mom’s co-workers, the biggest donation I’ve ever
personally received from my own co-worker (the Kreutzmans) at La Crescent High
School, some supporters who don’t even know me, and so many more!

I am so filled.  I
am so humbled.  I am SO full of joy!  I recently skyped with my friend Chris who
lives in Ecuador and when he first saw me on the video, he immediately commented, “Wow, you look great and so lively.  So full of joy!”  (And he knew NOTHING of what has happened to
me these past two weeks.) 

Indeed, I am so full of joy!  And it came from my three day retreat at a convent where I spent my days in prayer and reflection, letting Jesus love me and fill me. Thank you all for restoring in me the spirit of joy.  For reminding me that my identity is not tied to what I do, but who I am. Thank you for preventing Satan from robbing me of my identity as a
daughter of the King, a beloved whom God genuinely desires to bless.  God, my good, good Father, you are Enough for
me. (Listen to the song here: Good Good Father)

So, 2016, thanks to all of you—my army, my victors, my
givers—I am now ready for you!  (I fly
back to Swazi January 1st!)

Marissa treating me to Culvers after spoiling me Cracker Barrel with food and a laundry basket full of gifts!

Mom and Dad picking me up at the airport in Chicago

HS Bestie Lauren taking me to a Badger basketball game!

Spending time at sporting events of my ol’ students

Football and fun with my nephews

Kelly and my second fam: the Conways

Bowling and fun with Laura, Garret, Kiley, and Tony

Vising Mario in the hospital and praying for him

Jess and Kristen, my Newman fam!

In the presence of my beloved Bethie-boo

The Fab Four cheering on our old HS coach!

My grandma, my main reason for coming home.

Christmas with my family! And in this picture, my extended family.  All the Martin cousins together at last!