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Little Bits of Daily Life
It’s the middle of Saturday, and Lucia and Benji are taking a nap. (Me time, yay!) I’m sitting on the sofa—my favorite piece of furniture, as I had to search hard and far to find a truly comfy couch (you won’t believe how uncomfortable the furniture is here)—in front of my mini fan, and I’m
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Grandma’s Letters
It’s nearly better than her cooking. It’s like dark chocolate on a stressful day. A cold, glass bottle of Coke in the blistering heat. It nearly has the same effect of a head massage or foot rub at the end of an exhausting day. It satisfies, soothes, cools, tickles, and rejuvenates all at once. Since
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No Rush
Twenty minutes after Ash Wednesday service ends, and I’m still stuck in the church parking lot— plagued by the Toyota Noah’s beeping noise indicating my gear is in reverse— overcome by impatient anger that no car will let me back out so I can leave the one-way, gated parking exit. Aya is with me and
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How Can I Be Catholic?
“How can you be Catholic?” a college friend once asked me when she found out I attended mass. I led a Campus Crusade Bible study in one of the dorms, yet I went to a Catholic church. It was an oxymoron for some. Most of my friends were Evangelical Christians, and I loved them dearly,
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Transcendent Moments
I strum a chord to signify the start of Bible study at the girls home. We sing “Your Great Name,” one of their favorites and then dig into Scripture. I had noticed the girls were in a lot of stress. School was about to begin and there were still a lot of unknowns; our eldest
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For the First Time
Renewed. What does that actually mean? It’s not just refreshed, or rebuilt, or replenished, or reordered, or redone. They’re all great, but renewed. To become new again. It sounds simple, but it’s actually impossible. Or is it? A couple who’s been married for seventeen years and signing the divorce papers because the husband is narcissistic
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This is my War Cry
“All the nations surrounded me; in the Lord’s name I crushed them. They surrounded me on every side; in the Lord’s name I crushed them. They surrounded me like bees; they blazed like fire among thorns; in the Lord’s name I crushed them. I was hard-pressed and falling, but the LORD came to my help.
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It’s a Wonderful Life
“At the heart of Satan’s attack upon you is his attempt to rob you of your true identity and destiny.” –Neal Lozano, Unbound My last blog post was an attempt to regain parts of me that I feel I have lost. Satan had done well in distracting me from receiving God’s full blessing. It’s a
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What I Need
“What do you need?” I’ve been asked hundreds of times throughout this past year and a half. I’ve always responded with needs of the ministry and my girls. But then a few people persist, “No, I mean you. What do you need?” I didn’t know. Now I do. I need to rediscover the joys of
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Bench Warmer
Sometimes, when I close my eyes, I am back in time on my high school basketball court. I can hear the crowd bellowing, particularly the student section that’s right beneath our basket; I can see my friend, wearing his “Hot-shooter 32, I heart Kate” t-shirt; I can smell the wet socks when our point guard
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Go Before Me
“God, are you there? I believe in you…I think. But then I start doubting. I want to believe,” she prayed one night as she laid on the bare concrete floor staring up the holes in the hut’s ceilings. She was alone as her friend Jane would be out all night on the streets, selling
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When We Love Like That
I get a phone call one night from Tenele: “Mom, it’s not good here. My mother is talking things again and she just want money. She no want me here. I’m going to leave at month’s end.” I’m not surprised. Deep down I knew this was going to be the result, but I had hoped
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Hustlers
I know these streets so well. I’ve walked them hundreds of times. Yet, somehow they seem foreign now in the dark. Nighttime transforms them into a world I do not know. Nor want to know. “Let’s just drive a couple laps around and pray for those we see,” Rachel comments. It’s our first street night.
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Rich Soil
Over the past two months, I didn’t chase after Tenele. I didn’t pursue her or go looking for her at Mangwaneni like in the past. (In fact, I didn’t go to Mangwaneni very much because I couldn’t face the pain of seeing Tenele there.) There is a time and season for everything, and that season
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Puddle-Jumpers and Ocean-Crossers
“There comes a time when you need to stop crossing oceans for someone who won’t jump a puddle for you.” During my last week of my visit in the States, something significant (but by no means good) happened that prepared me for continuing my “redeeming love” journey with Tenele. It was a heartbreaking situation with
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Child, Look Again
After exposing my inner anguish and admitting my struggles with joy and self, I was encouraged by several people to commit more time to prayer. My friend Jess told me that Mother Teresa’s Sisters of Charity commit two hours of prayer every day so their ministry might be successful. So I went to mass and
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I Shall Not Be In Want
Jehovah-Raah, the Lord my Shepherd This is one of my favorite names of God! While the Ambassador team, led by my sweet sister, was in Swazi last month, I was able to occasionally join them for team devotions at night. One particular night that I was feeling this separation from Joy and confusing degradation of
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Nothingness
In my journal on 7/9/15, I wrote: If you have nothing good to say, than your nothingness is your true poverty. I used to average 2 blog posts per month. But in the last three and a half months combined, I’ve written only one. My absence of words and posts is not due to my
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Generation of Quitters
“We are not here to make an impression. We are here to make a difference.” -Ann Voskamp “Everyone loves ‘justice’ until there’s a cost.” – Eugene Cho “We are called to spiritual warfare, not to a sheltered life of comfort without pain. Our comfort comes from knowing who God is. We are called to be
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